This is what our dream ski resort looks like

We spent the last season devising the ideal ski resort, and this is what it looks like. Welcome to Fall-Line Mountain!

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Phew! Who would have thought that after all these months of research, planning and building Fall-Line’s Fantasy Ski Resort we’d reach the day when we’re finally able to open to you, our wonderful, loyal skiing readers.

Yes, everything is now in place and the incredible, Utah-standard, light-as-air, fluffy-as-a-feather powder we’ve managed to locate in a previously unknown micro-climate corner of the French Alps is lying waist deep, ready for your enjoyment. Rest assured our snow forecasting models suggest a foot of fresh will fall every night through to May, so there’s no need to hurry too much.

The extra good news is that this great snow pocket is located in an area where we’ve been able to install the latest lifts to access the world’s biggest-yet lift-served vertical. In fact it’s the first 3,000m lift-served vert on the planet, over taking our neighbour Chamonix, so we’re quite pleased about that little first!

Although you don’t have to rely on the lifts because, as requested by our focus group, there is free heli-skiing for subscribers too. We needed special dispensation from the French government for that one, it being banned at all other French resorts, but they were very accommodating. We sent our invitation out to Glen Plake to come and host the official opening ceremony (“it’d be my honour”, was his response), and you’re all invited! VIP guests include all those who helped crowd-source our perfect resort with Facebook feedback, and everyone else can just jump on the Eurostar at London St Pancras and ask the guard for a ticket to ‘Fall-Line Mountain’ and we’ll see you there.

In case you have any doubts, remember it’s your duty to be there – those amazing new slopes, chutes and gullies won’t name themselves you know? We need you dropping down them and coming up with the perfect name to sum up each line. But perhaps best to leave that naming decision until later in the evening after you’ve had time to ponder the perfect title whilst soaking in the hot tub, enjoying a complimentary massage and supping on your free beer. There’s no rush.